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A Guide to the Good Life – The Ancient Art of Stoic Joy – William B. Irvine (Summary)

A Guide to The Good Life – William Irvine (Mind Map Book Summary)

I was wondering why it all sounds familiar and then it hit my … this is basically Patanjali’s Yoga Sutras or very parallel.

Stoicism in a nutshell
1. Fame and fortune vs tranquility and virtue.
2. Learn to want what you already have.
3. Immediately accept things that are outside of your control and focus on what you can do.

Explains other schools of thought philosophers and religions and give his opinion on them on Stoicism is about eliminating negative emotion. The author also goes into the whole timeline of the rise, fall and return of stoicism and also compares the other philosophies.

Focus on the things you can control and ignore the things you cannot control

It is recommended that you live like a poor person even if you are well off.

To be virtuous basically means to live in accordance with nature or living a life that’s aligned with your own set of values. Unlike animals we also have a reason which means that we were also designed to be reasonable. We are sociable people, so we need to live in harmony with our people.

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To be up perfect stoic stoic is to be a sage or a wise man.
1. Free from vanity as one is indifferent to good and evil.
2. Never feels grief.
3. Conduct is exemplary.

Pursue virtue for serenity, tranquility and happiness.

Think of the worst that can happen, if you’re prepared for the worst you wont get disappointed – reduces hedonic adaption – the same thing that makes people go back to their unhappy life even after winning the lottery. E.g. Think of the people you love and imagine if they suddenly vanished tomorrow?

Also when the worst does happen find the silver linings, see it as a purification or fresh start.

Don’t worry about being embarrassed as you think everyone feels it too but when was the last time you remembered someone else’s embarrassment and for how long? How bad was it?

Learn to love what you have. (Paras note: I see people who’ve managed to get everything and still chasing ghosts. Fancy cars, houses, dinners, awards and still not able to get a good night sleep while I’ve managed to have more fun and live more on a bicycle.)

Imagine the world your ancestors lived in, how happy would they be in our shoes.

Be at peace with what you can’t control, internalise these. Don’t waste time distracting yourself with thoughts on how to control things you can’t. You can’t control external things but you have control of internal.

Trichotomy – We don’t have control of things, we have control of things and we have some control of things. You have partial control of winning a sports match by practicing and becoming the best you can be. Internalise your goals. Your goal will not be to win the match but to play the best of your ability.

Fatalism – Think of it all as fate. If you’ve been given the fate of beggar, play it well. Love the people that fate has surrounded you with. Be the best actor in the part you’ve been given. The past is there to serve us as lessons. All you have is this moment. Definitely don’t waste your time on the future either.

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Self denial – Practice misery and suffering in real life. Delay drinking water after a workout. (Paras note: I personally try not to switch on the air conditioner until I’m desperate).

Reflect on your behaviour at the end of the day and see where you could have used stoicism better. Give yourself some advice and debrief with yourself at the end of the day.

Try to simultaneously be a participant and a spectator.

Count your admirers to know how many are jealous of you. You have a social duty. People are going to be annoying and the bad side of human nature will show up. But that doesn’t mean you should just tolerate them, try to love them. Most people especially religious do good things to gain merit. You can enjoy your true delight without trying to please a higher power. The want to do it is better and will increase our virtue and tranquility.

Apart from being selective of people you befriend, Epictitus warns against whiny and complaining people. Don’t talk trivial and stick to important things.

Sex is nothing but bodies causing friction. Don’t put it on a pedestal. Think of the person you lust after as someone or releases mucus, pus, phlegm, etc. A wise man will marry and bring children into the world.

Insults – The best form of revenge is to refuse to be like the other person. Consider their criticism. Think if they are qualified in the field. If you respect them, think about what they said, if not then it doesn’t matter. Think of them as overgrown children. If they are deeply flawed then pity them. It’s your internal choice. Respond with humour, agree and amplify, by laughing it off we imply that we don’t take the insulter seriously. Self-deprecating humour is especially powerful, since we’re removing their best ammunition. Give no response at all, this requires no thought, and implies that the insulter is entirely beneath our notice. Sometimes the best insult is a vigorous one not out of spite but to correct bad behaviour. Do not try protect others from insults as it will weaken them, instead teach them techniques. (For more click here – Insults and Putdowns – Dealing with them & Responses)

Grief – Stoics grieve but do not prolong it. Negative visualisation prepares us for it. We’ll appreciate things more and have less regrets. Sometimes peoples emotions will overtake their reason and it’s ok to let them know. Sympathise with people in grief but don’t catch others grief and let it disturb your inner harmony. If someone is poisoned would you take the same poison?

Anger – It is seen as anti-joy. It’s a brief insanity. Anger has been the source of destruction on all scales. You can spiral into it. Resist assuming the worst of people and jumping to conclusions. Sometimes it can benefit us but it’s better to stay away otherwise you may lose yourself to anger for short-term gain. Using humour is one of the best ideas. See the funny side or benefit of what made you angry. Your anger will anger another so agree to go easy on each other. Changing the physical state could help e.g. smile, speak softly, walk slowly, etc. Apologise immediately if you can it will help you reduce the occurrence especially if you are over sensitive and get angry often. Anger is like a mosquito bite and if you scratch it you’ll want to scratch it more.

Fame – People think things will make them happy but will make them anxious and unhealthy. The price of fame is more than the reward. Stoics value freedom. Be indifferent to others approval and disapproval and laugh it off internally. You have to sweat to get approval of others and that means adopting their values which are not yours. Do things that attract disdain. (Paras note: My life story :oP and something that has helped me do, experience and enjoy life so much more). Ironically doing your own things will get ‘their’ respect as you are self-confident and self-congruent.

Wealth – Wealth can provide a lot but not contentment, not help us with grief, etc. Not needing wealth is a much bigger wealth. Once again wealthy need to keep up appearances and spoil their pallets and lives with over pampering. Stoics focus on natural desires e.g. when thirsty water will do (Paras note: Food serves a purpose and I eat to live, the bigger bellied people I see live to eat and have no will power or don’t know their limits, they’re not in tune with their bodies that they carry all day everyday.) Dress for the elements not to impress others or follow fashions. Live with simple furnishings. The real necessities are either cheap and/or easy to obtain. If you get wealth don’t shun it but enjoy it thoughtfully and use it to benefit others too. Remember to practice self-denial regularly (see above).

Exile – It’s just a change of place and there are people in the world willing living in such situations. Your tranquility, place in nature and virtue will still be with you and so will the friends who matter. It’s a great place and time to improve ourselves.

Old Age – Youth don’t care much for tranquility because the world is their oyster. After obstacles they’ll get philosophical and realise overcoming obstacles is a reward and double their efforts. If they’ve just achieved material wealth they’ll have a midlife crisis, you know flashy car and young bimbo, etc. As we age we lose our ability to enjoy pleasures and so reduce a desire for them. Vices decay and we enjoy stoicism more as we age. Taking up stoicism early you’re basically more prepared for old age.

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Death – Contemplating death will help us appreciate life and enjoy it more. Think of things you feel are worth dying for. Stoics committed suicide feeling they need to choose their moment and while they’re still capable. No stoics died for bad reasons. Have a coherent philosophy on life. Stoics say you have to live as if it was your last.

Practicing Stoicism – The hard part is denial of pleasures. It takes effort in not craving and looking for something. The important part is that you decide and you make your choices. To make it easier have an idea of what you want so you know what you don’t want. Keep it on the down low when starting, stealth stoicism. Things you will gain – being virtuous, tranquility, appreciation, less anxiety, taking in experiences in their true form, not being attached in getting ‘only the best’. Become self aware and reasoning abilities to see the truth and be at one with nature.

  • Start with negative visualisation
  • Next master control (see Trichotomy above for the 3 types of control)
  • Self-denial is an advanced technique
  • Practice collecting insults (self-deprecation suggested by author)

The author feels man can cope much better or without therapy, shrinks, quacks, etc. Studies from holocaust survivors, AIDS patients, abused women, etc show that it’s like picking at a scab and makes things worse. Being a victim only has a loose connection with external forces. Help yourself and also show others that their wellbeing is in their own hands. It’s best to modify our own outlook and behaviour before going to the doctor for surgeries and medication. Eat well and exercise and you don’t need that liposuction. Do you want scientific side-effects that are bad or stoic side-effects that are beneficial?

Stoic reading program

Contents
Acknowledgments xi Introduction: A Plan for Living 1

PART ONE – THE RISE OF STOICISM
ONE – Philosophy Takes an Interest in Life
TWO – The First Stoics
THREE – Roman Stoicism

PART TWO – STOIC PSYCHOLOGICAL TECHNIQUES
FOUR – Negative Visualization: What’s the Worst That Can Happen?
FIVE – The Dichotomy of Control: On Becoming Invincible
SIX – Fatalism: Letting Go of the Past . . . and the Present
SEVEN – Self-Denial: On Dealing with the Dark Side of Pleasure
EIGHT – Meditation: Watching Ourselves Practice Stoicism

PART THREE STOIC ADVICE
NINE – Duty: On Loving Mankind
TEN – Social Relations: On Dealing with Other People
ELEVEN – Insults: On Putting Up with Put-Downs
TWELVE – Grief: On Vanquishing Tears with Reason
THIRTEEN – Anger: On Overcoming Anti-Joy
FOURTEEN – Personal Values: On Seeking Fame
FIFTEEN – Personal Values: On Luxurious Living
SIXTEEN – Exile: On Surviving a Change of Place
SEVENTEEN – Old Age: On Being Banished to a Nursing Home
EIGHTEEN – Dying: On a Good End to a Good Life
NINETEEN – On Becoming a Stoic: Start Now and Prepare to Be Mocked

PART FOUR – STOICISM FOR MODERN LIVES
TWENTY – The Decline of Stoicism
TWENTY-ONE – Stoicism Reconsidered
TWENTY-TWO Practicing Stoicism

A Stoic Reading Program
Notes
Works Cited
Index

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