Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway by Susan Jeffers

How to turn your fear and indecision into confidence and action.

Love it! It has profound knowledge and different angles of looking at fear to show us how we can tackle it, dance with it and eventually take it to bed and bang it’s brains out so it can leave us to have a cigarette. (Sorry, been off cigarettes for a while and feel like having one). Like all good knowledge, Susan gives us a small line or two at a time and expounds on it. E.g. in the first chapter I found the best knowledge in the whole book and all that line said was… I CAN HANDLE IT. Then she’ll go on to why our fears are really just the thought of us not being able to handle a situation. Below are some of the lines or angles on what she shares in the book. I wont give too much away. Another one is about our loved ones being so caring they install that fear in us and I might even put up my own bicycle story in a separate post as an example.

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Snippets of the knowledge…
– Fear is you thinking you can’t handle it.

– 5 Truths About Fear:
1 – Fear will never go away.
2 – The only way to get over the fear of something is to DO IT! For more info see Progressive Overload & Directing Growth to Get Better at Anything e.g. Gaining Confidence to Talk To Anyone
3 – The only way to feel better about myself is to go DO IT!
4 – Everyone experiences fear in unfamiliar situations.
5 – Pushing through fear is less freighting than living with it.

– Fear will never go away as long as you continue to grow so go and do what you fear coz not only are you going to experience fear on unfamiliar but so is everybody. Pushing through it is easier than living with the fear of helplessness.

– She’s got this table where you can either choose Pain or Power. With pain comes helplessness, depression, paralysis and with power comes choice, excitement, action. Stuff like even your wording is important like if you say “I can’t” it comes from pain and if you say ‘I won’t’ it comes from power.

– Taking responsibility for everything. Don’t blame others, don’t blame yourself, know when you’re not taking responsibility, handle your ‘chatterbox’ and be aware of payoffs e.g. staying in a situation because you’re comfortable in the rut. And know how to handle it even if it’s going to be stressful. Knowing there is more than one choice in any situation.

– Affirmations and positive thinking and one that I’ve stuck to since I came to London … avoiding people that make you feel like you’re not capable (or the bucket of crabs) of things and how to handle these people if they’re loved ones. For more info – Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most by Douglas Stone, Bruce Patton, Sheila Heen of the Harvard Negotiation Project

– Seeing every situation as a win-win. A great example – a plane in the air is never on course till when it gets closer to the landing strip.

– Filling your life with lots of things so your focus is not only on one thing like a relationship because if that ends you’ll feel empty and useless. Of course allocate time for different stuff and give it your 100% when you’re focusing on that.

– Genuine giving in love and not in expectation of getting.

– Surrounding yourself with people you want to be like.

– She gets into her version of spirituality and some of the knowledge there too is amazing! And some cool visualization/self-hypnosis thing.

Big up Ameet for lending me the book.

Contents
INTRODUCTION – Opening the Door
1 – What Are You Afriad of … and Why?
2 – Can’t You Make It Go Away?
3 – From Pain to Power
4 – Whether You Want It or Not … It’s Yours
5 – Pollyanna Rides Again
6 – When “They” Don’t Want You to Grow
7 – How to Make a No-Lose Decision
8 – How Whole Is Your “Whole Life”?
9 – Just Nod Your Head – Say “Yes!”
10 – Choosing Love and Trust
11 – Filling the Inner Void
12 – There Is Plenty of Time
BIBLIOGRAPHY
OTHER RESOURCES
EXTRACTS FROM READERS’ LETTERS

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