Mchongoano from Ada translated by Lisa/Paras

Mchongoano – roasting/teasing/enjoying etc etc
– Ati first time yako kubuy gari ulisema ufungiwe unaenda mbali.
[The first time you bought a car you asked if they could wrap it coz you’re going far]

– Ati kwenu mko upto date mpaka watoi wenu wakipigwa wana “vibrate” badala ya kulia.
[In your house you’re so ‘up to date’ your kids vibrate instead of crying when then are scolded.]

– Ati naskia nyi ni wengi mpaka nyi hukunywa chai na sprinkler.
[I hear you’re so many you drink tea using a sprinkler]

– First time uliona soda,ulifinya finya kujua gani ni ripe.
[First time you saw a soda, you squeezed them to know which one was ripe]

– Ati naskia we ni fala mpaka ulienda cyber ukaulizia stamp ati ndio uweke kwa email.
[I hear you’re so thick when you went to the cyber you asked for a stamp to put on the email]

– Nilikupata umezubaa ukiangalia chupa ya orange juice…ati juu imeandikwa ‘concentrate’….
[That one about being found staring at a bottle of orange juice coz it said ‘concentrate’]

– Naskia ulienda para sunday school. (para=parallel)
[You went to the parallel programme (like UON’s parallel prog) for Sunday School]

– Naskia simu yako iko na slot ya coins…..
[I hear your phone has a slot for coins]

– Una kichwa sooo ukithink kuna echo….!
[You have such a big head when you think it echoes]

– Ati you r so ugly vile ulizaliwa uliwekwa kwa incubator tinted ndio usi shtue watoi wengine…..!!
[You’re so ugly when you were born you were put in a tinted incubator so you don’t scare the other kids] HAHAHAHA

– Ati umekonda mpaka ukivaa vest bado unakunja sleeves!
[Your so thin even when you wear a vest you’re still folding the sleeves]

– Ati T.V yenu iko na mouse.
[Your TV has a mouse]